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Feral Wench

Adventures of a not-quite-tame female

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Twisted Fairy Tales: The Farting Princess

September 5, 2023 by theferalwench

A story by Diana Dandelion: Once upon a time there was a king and a queen and their little daughter “Rosebud”.  Rosebud was a beautiful, fair daughter who brought much joy to her parents, however there was only one serious flaw: The young princess was cursed with a smelly flatulence problem. She farted green, smelly…

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Sleepover For 350,000

May 25, 2022 by theferalwench

“I like smoke and lightnin’ Heavy metal thunder Racing with the wind And the feeling that I’m under” Lyrics: Born to Be Wild, Steppenwolf The feeling of night air rushing by and the glare of the headlights and taillights from the cars in the lanes behind and beside her was exhilarating. Diana was in the…

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The Parasite

January 2, 2022 by theferalwench

“How long does it have to go on? This punishment? Haven’t I done time enough, haven’t I served my term? Can’t I apply for a pardon?” – Tennessee Williams, Cat on a Hot Tin Roof “Well, a hard headed woman A soft hearted man Been the cause of trouble Ever since the world began” Lyrics:…

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When She Flew The Coop II

December 6, 2021 by theferalwench

“Did you write the book of love, and do you have faith in God above If the Bible tells you so? Now do you believe in rock and roll, can music save your mortal soul And can you teach me how to dance real slow?” Lyrics: American Pie, Don Mclean   “Better a dry crust…

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When She Flew The Coop I

December 5, 2021 by theferalwench

“The sunsets come The sunsets go The clouds roll by And the earth turns old And the young bird’s eyes Do always glow She must fly She must fly She must fly” Lyrics: White Bird, David and Linda LaFlamme Diana had been planning her escape for months. She’d been secretly saving most of the money…

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Spiders from the past

March 21, 2021 by theferalwench

From the personal journal of Diana Dandelion, 2005: One pill makes you larger, and one pill makes you small, And the ones your mother gives you don’t do anything at all; go ask Alice, when she’s 10 feet tall. When men on the chessboard get up and tell you where to go, and the white…

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Coming Soon

March 18, 2021 by theferalwench

An experimental writing and art project…

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